Dreams Can Come True

By Emmie

For Chrissy

She dragged the brush through her long, thick hair and watched as it tumbled down over her shoulders. She took a clip and tugged the loose hairs from around her face into it. She slipped her shoes on and dropped her arms to her side, surveying her overall image. In her new, navy blue skirt and jacket and a lilac blouse she looked very much the smart, sophisticated registrar she was meant to be. She didn’t normally dress smart like this for work, especially not for working on paediatrics, but since it was her first day she thought she had better make a good impression.

She picked up the necklace from the dressing table next to her and put it on. She always wore it. Not a day had gone by since he had given it to her when she hadn’t had it on. It was almost like her security blanket, it was like protection. Protection against the world and everything it entailed, and protection against her feelings which threatened to devour her every day. It was a diamond heart on a fine silver chain, and it glittered and glimmered when it caught the light. It was the most beautiful piece of jewellery that she had ever seen, and she doubted it had come cheap. But he had insisted that she have it. Little did he know at the time that she would betray him terribly just the next day and leave him.

So, content that her image was suitable, she headed out of her bedroom and down the stairs and grabbed her coat, almost tripping over the various boxes that littered her new house that she hadn’t yet got round to unpacking. She picked up her phone, keys and bag from the table and headed for the door. As she was leaving she turned and glanced back into the hallway. The place was a tip, but then that was no real surprise considering she had only moved in a couple of days ago. But there was something missing. She fingered the delicate necklace that hung round her neck. He wasn’t there, and it didn’t seem right. But there was nothing she could do about that now, she had seen to that. Sighing, she closed the door behind her and headed off to work.

* * * * *

She pulled up in the car park of St Catherine’s Hospital. She stepped out of her new car and slung her bag over her shoulder. New. Everything was new. A new car, new house, new job, new outfit, and a new life. The ‘old her’ had so many problems and so much to worry about. She was determined that the ‘new her’ was going to leave all that in the past and move on. This new start was a chance to get her life back on track. At least here no one would know her past, so it would be much easier to banish it from her life.

* * * * *

She paused in front of a large board, which displayed arrows pointing to different areas of the unfamiliar hospital. She scoured the board, looking for directions to paediatrics. “Can I help you?” as voice asked from behind her.

She spun round, startled. Her jaw dropped as she lay eyes on the owner of the voice. She seemed to freeze, speechless, staring at the man in front of her, her eyes locked in his, which returned her utterly shocked look. “P . . . Patrick!” she muttered, not sure whether to throw herself into his arms as she was so glad to see him, or whether to turn and run like she had before, run away from all the memories and problems he brought along.

“Um . . . hi Holly,” he replied, also not sure of what to say. What did you say to someone who meant so much to you yet didn’t know it? To someone who had just disappeared over a year and a half ago without warning or explanation? To someone who you ought to be angry with for what they put you through, but all you want to do is embrace them and shut out everything else. “I . . .” he began.

“Look, I’d better go, going to be late,” Holly mumbled quickly and almost incoherently, cutting him off before he had a chance to say anything. She broke their eye contact and dashed off, staring at the ground. Patrick stared after her, not knowing what to say or do. He had dreamed for so long of finding Holly again, but now that he had he hadn’t the faintest idea what to do. So he watched her walk away. He could always find her later.

* * * * *

Luckily Holly’s morning had been so busy that she hadn’t had time to dwell on what had happened as she entered the building that morning. She had been able to forget it and concentrate on her work. But now things had quietened down and she was on her way to the canteen to buy some lunch that her rumbling stomach was looking forward to. She couldn’t say she wasn’t pleased to see Patrick, but she had wanted to come here to make a fresh start away from people she knew. Of course that couldn’t happen now, Patrick knew more about her past than anyone else could and all she had to do was look at him and all sorts of memories came flooding back, pleasant ones as well as terrible ones.

Sometimes when she looked at him she would remember being held in his arms and laughing and smiling. Then other times she remembered the fear she felt when she was being stalked, the terror that followed her everywhere. The reason Patrick triggered that particular memory was because he was always there at the time, he was always waiting there to comfort her when it got too much and she couldn’t cope. She might not have got through it all if it hadn’t have been for him. Still, as much as he meant to her, she wasn’t sure she wanted to face him, not just yet.

As she entered the canteen, still lost in thought, she almost walked headlong into Patrick. Just her luck to bump into the very person she had been trying hard to avoid. Holly turned round and flew straight back out of the canteen. Patrick followed her and grabbed her shoulder as she tried to escape down the corridor to her left. “Holly!” he called out. “Wait! Can’t we just talk?”

“I don’t want to talk,” she stated bluntly as she began to walk away again.

Patrick pulled her back. “Well maybe I do!”

“Fine, but not . . .” Holly was cut off by the bleeping of Patrick’s pager.

Patrick groaned. “Look, can we talk later?”

“I suppose.”

“Look Hol, I’m not going to work here in the same hospital as you and not speak to you and never see you! I’m not going to let that happen! Look, why don’t I come and see you later, after my shift. I could come and help you unpack or something. Where are you living?”

Holly sighed, she couldn’t shut him out any longer. “36 Woodburn Terrace,” she told him. “Know where that is?”

He nodded. “Well, duty calls,” he said fingering his pager. “I’ll see you later then.” As he turned to leave a flash of silver round her neck caught his eye. He smiled to himself as he walked away. He must at least mean something to her if she wore that necklace. Or at least he hoped he was important to her.

* * * * *

Holly hummed along to the music as she sorted objects from the cardboard box in front of her into piles. She carried a pile of plates into the kitchen, stacked them away in a cupboard then returned to the living room where a sea of boxes flooded the floor. She knelt down on the floor and began to unpack some mugs. She was interrupted by the ringing of the doorbell. She jumped up and went to let Patrick in.

“Nice house,” he commented as she led him nervously through into the living room. “How much stuff do you own!” he joked as he took in the many boxes that surrounded him.

“Shut up you!” she replied cheekily, jabbing her elbow into his side.

“We’ve got our work cut out here!”

“Yeah well we’d better get on with it then hadn’t we.”

They had been unpacking for a few minutes before Patrick asked, “Why did you go?” Hurt sounded in his voice as he remembered waking up to find her gone.

Holly put down the pile of photograph frames she was holding and turned to look at him. “Well . . . I suppose . . . I didn’t feel comfortable in Holby anymore, not after what happened with . . .Tom. I needed to get away, I was overpowered by horrible memories and I felt like I wouldn’t breathe half the time!”

“So it was nothing to do with me then?”

“No. No, of course not! Why would it be?”

“Well I don’t know! It’s not like you even told me you were going . . . let alone why! What was I supposed to think?” Patrick cried.

Holly’s eyes glinted with tears. “I’m sorry Patrick. I really am.”

“Why didn’t you ask me to come with you? You know I would have!” he asked, his voice softer. Holly hung her head, studying the pattern on the carpet. Silence. “Hol?”

“I . . . I don’t know,” she mumbled. And that was the truth, she couldn’t give a reason why she had gone and left the one person who cared so much abut her behind.

An uncomfortable silence hung between them as they went back to unpacking. The only noise was the rustling of boxes and the CD player, which was playing ‘Dreams’ by Gabrielle . . .

Dreams can come true
Look at me babe I'm with you
You know you gotta have hope
You know you've got to be strong

Do you hear what I'm saying
Gotta say how I feel
I can't believe you're here
But I know that you're real
I know what I want
And baby it's you
Can't deny my feelings
Because they are true

“I’m sorry Patrick!” Holly said suddenly, touching his shoulder gently. “I’m so sorry, for . . . for everything.”

“It’s okay Hol, it’s okay,” he whispered, reaching up to her cheek and wiping away a tear that had crept out.

“You think we can make another go at it?” she asked nervously.

“Oh I think we can try,” he replied, smiling as he leaned forward to kiss her . . .

I'm not making plans for tomorrow
Let's live for tonight
I know I want you baby
So hold me so tight
Put your arms around me
You make me feel so safe
Then you whisper in my ear
That you're here to stay

Dreams can come true
Look at me babe I'm with you
You know you gotta have hope
You know you've got to be strong