Take A Chance

By Emmie

Holly sipped at the mug of hot coffee in her hands as she flicked through the television channels trying to find something entertaining to watch. No, there was nothing, she decided after a minute or two. She turned off the TV and sat in the silence drinking her coffee. Silence. That was one thing she was used to, yet at the same time couldn’t get used to. At work it was always so busy and noisy, she hardly got a moment to herself. Then when she got home all was quiet. You would have thought she would be glad of the peace, but it reminded her of what she didn’t have. People with partners and children didn’t live alone in the silence of their almost deserted houses. Not like she did.

The quiet also gave her time to think. And thinking wasn’t exactly what she wanted to do. Not when her mind was filled with all the problems and worries that haunted her. Whenever she was left to think her mind would swirl with thoughts of everything that was wrong with her life, and everything it could be if only she ever stopped being stubborn and wary and let her true feelings show.

She had almost had it. There was one point where she thought that she might possibly be coming close to having the kind of life she dreamed of. With Patrick. It could have been the beginning of something. They were only going to go for a drink, but ‘just a drink’ could have led to something more serious. But it wasn’t just that. On that day they both had to face up to memories from the past. Ed had showed up again, and because of that they had to conquer things that otherwise would have been left untouched. That day they both uncovered some of their deepest feelings that had been buried for countless years, and admitted to themselves and each other that there was still something there. Still a spark between them. After so long the flame was still flickering, not quite dead. There was something.

Tears began to roll gently down Holly’s cheeks. Thinking about what could have happened that day, and what could have changed as a result of it, wasn’t easy. But thinking about the events that followed was even more painful. They had come between her and Patrick and made everything so much more complicated. Holly let out a small cry and hung her head. There was so much that could have happened but didn’t. And so much that shouldn’t have happened but did.

And all because of Tom. As if it wasn’t enough that he had stalked her and invaded her life for months he then came back, at a time when that was the last thing she needed. While he had her locked up in that bare, empty ward her mind had been spinning. How could she escape? How would she get away before it was too late? Would someone notice she was missing and get help? And what would Patrick think when she wasn’t there at the end of the shift to go for their drink?

Of course she knew now that it was stupid to think Patrick would blame her for not being there when she said she would. He wouldn’t be angry with her if she had been missing for half of her shift because someone had kidnapped her – that was just ridiculous! But at the time she had been so worked up and scared that her thoughts were muddled and confused.

Since that day everything had changed. She had just been beginning to get over the whole stalking incident when he came back. But after he kidnapped her the feeling of fear and unease had returned, and worse than it had been before, despite the fact he was dead. The fear was slowly easing, but there were still times when she felt it overwhelm her and take control. And, that night, she had never gone on that drink with Patrick. All she had wanted to do was curl up somewhere safe and hide. She wasn’t in the mood to go out. But as the weeks went by they had never had that drink. Even now, three months later, it still hadn’t happened.

Holly sighed. She still wasn’t with Patrick. He was still there, waiting in the background, there to be her shoulder to cry on and a source of comfort when she needed him. Just like he always was and always had been. But it wasn’t enough. She needed Patrick more than anything. She needed him to come and invade the silence in her home and in her life. She wanted him to be there all the time and to wake up beside him every morning. She wanted him.

She jumped up from the sofa, placed her mug on the table and grabbed her coat that was hanging by the door. She was fed up of wishing and hoping. She was going to do something about it. She rushed out of the door and headed towards Patrick’s house . . .

* * * * *

Patrick collapsed on the sofa in front of the TV. He hated spending his evenings like this: alone in front of the Tele with a drink and a take away. He needed more than that. He often found himself working extra shifts just to avoid returning home to his empty house. And that’s all it was: a house. You couldn’t call it a home. A home was warm and welcoming. His was neither without Holly there.

He had nearly lost her. A few months ago he had nearly lost her forever. When he realised that Tom had taken her again he had been frantic, looking everywhere he could possibly think to find her. Luckily he had eventually. If he had been only seconds later she might have died. He still remembered her clinging on to him desperately after he revived her. He still heard her sobs as they echoed in his head. Still felt the damp of her tears on his shoulder.

They were going to go for a drink. It was all arranged. After so long pining after each other with lingering hugs and longing looks they had come to their senses. Then Tom had invaded and shaken everything up. Holly had been so cut up she hadn’t even thought about their ‘date’ and neither had he. All that had concerned him was being there for Holly and making sure she was all right. Even though Tom was dead that didn’t stop the fear in Holly. She never said anything, but he could tell that it still affected her sometimes. He couldn’t bear to see her like that.

Maybe it was time to remind her about that drink. Perhaps he should go and see her and sort things out between them. He couldn’t bear life without her for much longer. Patrick switched off the television and grabbed his coat, heading out of the front door and towards Holly’s house . . .

* * * * *

Holly’s footsteps echoed along the street. It was almost midnight and pitch black. The darkness was broken up by street lamps, which shone a dull yellow colour, penetrating the black air. She shivered. Even though it was summer it was still cold.

Suddenly she heard the sound of other footsteps mix with that of her own. They were in the distance, but growing stronger and louder as the other person drew nearer. As she reached a lamppost she looked up, then stopped as she realised who it was.

“Patrick.”

“Holly.”

They stood in silence for a few seconds. Then Patrick moved forward, bathed in the light from the lamp above them and placed his hands gently on her shoulders. “We need to talk. I think we both know that.” Holly nodded and looked up into his gaze. He could tell by the look in her eyes what she was feeling.

“I was just coming to see you,” she said quietly. Tears stung her eyes as she spoke. “I . . . I don’t want to be alone anymore Patrick! I can’t bear it anymore.”

Patrick opened up his arms and hugged her tight and she buried her head on his shoulder. “Me neither Hol.” He sighed. “Me neither.”